board meetings

So I read a devotional last week that really hit home. I think it was a sign of what God wanted me to in the week following it so I really sought the guidance of this devo when it spoke of really organizing your life like a CEO would. You are the CEO of your life but you need a great group of board members to guide your company. So I called a bunch of guys last week just sharing my heart and life. And as I thought last week between thoughts of desiring 'stability' in my life I just came to the conclusion that its not really about pursuing stability but pursuing God himself.

I desire stability for the thought of providing that for someone else in my life. I know that life is never about money but if I was to get things going with someone in my life then stability financially would be a must to have on the offering table. I want to have that now but I think God is teaching me more by pursuing Him. Stability will come through our walk with the Lord. He will provide. We must trust that He knows our heart but its a must that we lay our desires and hearts at his feet. I dont need anything else in life other than Christ...not one thing...

The hardest part is putting my dreams of being married and dreams of sharing life with someone at the foot of the Cross. Its really interesting how in once sense you know that God desires to prosper you and give you hope but there is a huge part of me that thinks I can do this part of life on my own and really just to pursue the route that would get me what I want quicker.

All this comes as I wait to hear about a one year STINT with AIA in South Africa. If accepted I would support raise and then aim to leave in Sept. 2009 for one year. If not accepted then I would look to get back in to football most likely.

A verse that really give more meaning now as I look at it is Proverbs 13:12....'hope deffered makes the heart sick..but when desire comes it is a tree of life'.

I press on to meet God and share with Him my specific dreams...after all He aches to hear from His children and we need to go through this life sharing each dream with Him along the way but in the end I desire His will most of all...